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This pattern needs to stop. What I know- 1. Intense emotions in the beggining of a relationship is a red. Do take ennitiative to communicate with a partner. However don't ignore instincts, if somthing smells fishy it probably is. Your behavior or theres Lying is a defense mechanism, we all lie to ourselves to one degree or another, that is normal and fine. As you get closer to somone, it decrees I mean light lies, such as, "Im tired and don't feel like going out tonight", but really meaning, "hey I don't feel comfortable and cannot say that directly" 2.

If you try to communicate and deal with issues before someone really knows you, there going to get defensive. If they get triggered you notice and get triggered Downward spiral.

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